Top Ten Ways to You Know You've Had Too Much Coffee:

1. Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
2. You lick your coffeepot clean.
3. You can't even remember your second cup.
   
4. You can jump-start your car without cables.
5. People get dizzy just watching you.
6. Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
7. Instant coffee takes too long.
8. You want to be cremated just so you can spend the rest life in a coffee can.
9. You name your cats "Cream" and "Sugar."
10. You're the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you don't even work there.